By Rick Aristotle Munarriz (TMF Edible)

( December 15, 1999 ) -- Like a McMahon stunt gone wrong, Bogey brings up the very reasons why WWF frightens me as a long-term investment. Monthly pay-per-view events. Nine hours of weekly television programming. Tell me, do you think the consumer's appetite will be for more or less WWF by this time next year? Do you really think the public will be clamoring for that tenth or eleventh hour?

If you do, then maybe you will side with Bogey and see this as a bona-fide growth stock. Every year folks will get a little hungrier for what The Rock is cooking. Every year folks will --

Wait a minute! This isn't realistic. WWF is already hitting that point in its lifecycle where Cheers' Sam and Diane get together, where Yoko Ono is stripping down with John Lennon, where Freddy Krueger is battling his own offspring. Because WWF has so much airtime to fill, the bout plots have gone to extreme and unsustainable levels. The demand being placed on the athletic actors is too much. From Owen Hart's tragic plunge back in May to the growing series of injuries to WWF stars, it's clear that the league has run out of peril-free adventure. Hart's death occurred during WWF's Over the Edge pay-per-view event. There's never been a sadder case of truth in advertising than that right there.

This past weekend's WWF event? Armageddon. Doesn't that stand for the final battle? It sure feels that way. The sponsors are walking away. Monday Night Football came back to its original 9:00 p.m. slot. The WWF toys are stacked high on the closeout bins.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, Bogey, but didn't they show you the storyboard this time? WWF loses the fight. WWF shareholders lose the war. Raw is what war does.

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