Ms. Emmons and I left Calisto's Bistro. I watched her drive away before I walked back to the Bazaar Safari. I slipped open the door and yanked off the tape I'd placed over the latch on my way out the last time. I hurried back to Safari Don's office and slipped his ledgers back in the safe after taking one last glance to see what I could see in them. Not much -- at least not much I understood. I was on my way out when something caught my eye.

Safari Don had left his day planner on his desk. After arriving in Los Angeles he had scheduled one day at each of his stores, one day at the zoo to arrange for transport of his latest rescuees, and one day to pick up cages for same. There was prices listed next to each of the animals and for the cages. I never knew zebras were so steep. And who'd pay $1500 for a lemur. What the hell WAS a lemur anyway, and why would someone want one?

Ah, there is was: "Thursday, 9:00--Pick up ring. 7:30 -- Dinner, pop question. 10:30 --Make whoopee."

No wonder the guy was so broken up when Rachel dumped him. No popping, no whoopee, and an unused $3000 ring. I couldn't say I blamed the girl--who'd marry a man who scheduled whoopee? Still, the question was how broken up was he? I closed the day planner and stood up...and came face-to-point with Safari Don himself, holding a decorative Mau Mau spear about an inch from my head. "Hey, be careful with that thing. You'll put your eye out!" I said, smiling as big as my face muscles would allow.

"I was thinking of putting yours out. What you're doing in my office?"

"I'm looking for the famous Safari Don! When I couldn't find anyone in the shop I came back here. Sorry for snooping, but I was hoping I could find out where he...you...were. You ARE the famous Safari Don, aren't you?"

"I'm Safari... but I'm not so famous. How'd you get in the store?" The spear was still in my face.

"Door was open, Mister...Don. And of COURSE you're famous. I can't tell you how proud we at Humanitarian Animal Rescue, Protection of Indigenous and Exotic Species -- HARPIES, for short -- are of you. We think your work is just wonderful. Our group is planning a safari soon and we think you're JUST the person to take us!"

Don dropped the spear and turned on his best mega-watt smile. "Well, thank you very much, and I'd be honored to charter a safari for the HARPIES. After all, that's why they call me Safari Don!"

"Of course it is!" I said, getting really tired of talking in exclamation points. "Tell me, Safari, where's that pretty young lady who was working here the other day when I stopped by? She was delightful."

"You must mean... Rachel. She's...no longer with me, I'm afraid."

Oh yeah, he was guilty of something, all right. I could tell by the way he glanced away when he mentioned her name. With professional killers it's sometimes hard to tell, but with rank amateurs and first-timers it's like reading a children's book. Now all I had to do was prove it.

I made a lame excuse to leave with a promise to come back with fistfuls of money the next day. I hopped in the Triumph and headed back to the office, thinking about something I'd seen in Don's ledger--along with his recent purchases, there was a list of returned items. I thought I'd try to figure out how those factored into income statements before I talked to Motli--give the old gal a thrill.

On one line it said that Safari Don's Bazaar Safari's sales were actually 3,650,000, but that customers either returned, or received allowances for 150,000 because of defects or other problems with merchandise. Safari's auditors wanted the company to show both the gross sales and the returns and allowances, rather than just showing the net sales. Why should a reader of income statements care about returns and allowances?

1) Showing all of the Bazaar's activity is more accurate than netting out some items.
2) Accountants do not like to take shortcuts in income statements.
3) For some companies, changes in returns and allowances could signal important operational changes.
4) All of the above.

Income Statement information provided by Joe Louderback.

The answer is 3) For some companies, changes in returns and allowances could signal important operational changes.

Changes in returns and allowances, especially in their percentage to sales, often signal important changes in strategies or in the marketplace. Retailers whose R&A are increasing could be pushing goods at customers, without concern for whether the goods well serve the customer. Ill will could result from such a policy. Or, quality of the retailer's products might be declining, with R&A furnishing an early clue. One function of income statements is to help investors form judgments about the future, and trends in important relationships often serve that function.

I'd actually figured out the answer to that one. Damn, I was getting good at this stuff. Motli would be proud. But not as proud as she would be if I managed to get this mook put away for icing his girlfriend. But if I was gonna do that I'd have to move fast. Safari was scheduled to head back to Africa in two days.

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