Monday, October 12, 1998

Easy Steps to Wise Investing
by Tom Poulton ([email protected])

Having mended my Wise ways, I now look back with a Foolish eye, and some degree of embarrassment, at the Wisdom with which I began investing. I had some simple rules that I followed that led me down the path of Wisdom to the state of misery that causes one to ask every April, "Why can't I take capital losses as an ordinary income deduction?"

My first rule for Wise Investing was easy: Always read every piece of unsolicited mail from every Wise Investment Advisor who can let you in on his (or her) secrets to becoming a millionaire while still in your bathrobe. Subscribe to $300 per year newsletters, use that $3.99 per minute "900" line, and be sure to blindly follow the buy and sell recommendations you read or hear. One day, you hit the jackpot. You get a little booklet in the mail promising unbelievable fortune if only you learn to trade futures like the master. After all, this Wise Master only trades his account a few hours a day and makes millions.

Of course, he makes his millions off the Wise suckers who buy his videos, attend his seminars, and generally abandon themselves to the ways of the Wise.

I've now completed my personal two-step recovery program:

Step One: Throw away every piece of unsolicited communications from the Wise Investment Advisors (unopened);

Step Two: Become a Fool.

I can look in the mirror every morning, smile at the Fool reflected therein, and feel good about myself. If you are interested in this remarkable two-step recovery program, just hit the Motley Fool Home Page at least once a day, and in moments of weakness, chant the mantra: "I believe in the Ways of the Fool... I believe in the Ways of the Fool ..."

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