Boring Portfolio Report
Wednesday, July 3, 1996

by Greg Markus (MF Boring)

ANN ARBOR, MI (July 3) -- Maybe I can just recycle yesterday's recap and use it tonight. Once again, warnings about earnings disappointments sent most market averages south. The S&P 500 index lost 0.18% in value, while the NASDAQ Composite index fell 10 points -- or a bit more than three-quarters of a percentage point. The DJIA receded 17 points.

As for the Borefolio, it lost $87.50, or 0.17%. I suppose there's some consolation in losing less than the market. (Yeah, right.)

This evening's market wrap from Reuters informs us that, with the FOMC non-event now behind us until Alan and the Eyeshades reconvene in August, "investors braced for Friday's key employment report for June."

So are YOU all thoroughly braced for Friday's very important employment numbers?? Me neither. Me, I'm heading over to Chicagoland to eat some pizza, listen to some music, and generally un-brace. With the market closed tomorrow and probably eight traders showing up for Friday's half-day session, I don't expect to be braced for a good four days yet. (Never fear, your Friday Borefolio breakdown will be here, sort of, for both of you folks who'll be clicking in.)

If you're getting the impression that I've started my holiday already and am loathe to discuss stocks or other Great Significances, well....

Let's see now, what else of zero utility can I share with you? Oh, I know!

You may recall that in last night's Borefolio report I directed your attention to Words of Wisdom as offered by one Brad Zipper, "senior trader at Herzog Heine Geduld," according to Reuters. Brad informed the world that on Tuesday "a lot of the reason shares were down was because they were so strong yesterday."

Today, I presume, a lot of the reason shares were down is because they were so weak yesterday. Let's find out. Click over to tonight's market recap as offered by Knight-Ridder, and you'll learn that -- and I swear I'm not making this up -- "Lance Zipper, managing director of equity trading at Brean Murray Foster Securities, said that the market is still in a consolidation phase with investors continuing to take profits."

Watch out, it's the Zipper Gang! Hey, I've never met Brad and Lance in my life. They're probably wonderful guys, and terrific dressers. But maybe they could let someone else take the call next time a reporter rings up?

I guess I've stalled long enough. Let's hit the stocks -- tonight, in the form of a football cheer. (Hey, why not?) Deep breath, and ...

Borders, Pimsee, TXI,
Each up a quarter, no poke in the eye!
Green Tree shed, but SHAW was unch.
Oxford lost another bunch!
Cisco had the network blues,
Down on Digi and Gandalf's news!
Gimme a Z!
Gimme another Z!
Gimme another Z!
What's that spell?
Zz-z.

Oh, yes: please don't send your Zipper jokes to me. Send them instead to MF Yakko. He just loves getting jokes in the mail. That's: [email protected].

I'm outta here. Catch you Friday.

(c) Copyright 1996, The Motley Fool. All rights reserved. This material is for personal use only. Republication and redissemination, including posting to news groups, is expressly prohibited without the prior written consent of The Motley Fool.

Transmitted: 7/3/96